My lifetime preference has always been partnership, I have never done 'alone' very well. But in my transition from couple to life alone, I have had to find a way to weave my hopes, needs and decisions into my story. Now it is about me, my and not us, our. I must say, that isn’t always comfortable and it has been a difficult learning curve.
I do wish I could again have Russ by my side to help with ‘the job of doing life’. And for those of you who do have a partner, this short video by Brene Brown’s is a powerful guide:
My favorite part begins at about 1:35...
I no longer have that. Of course I can reach out to family and friends, but I appreciate consistency. I appricate it when I have a person who knows me inside and out, my approach to daily struggles, my strategies, my financial stability, my triggers. Without that I must weave together a direction and a focus. I’m learning to weave; I’m just a beginner.
a jumble –
it’s my life
weaving it all together
on my own
but reaching out when i need to
sharing my load with others
now
with many people
not just one
in and out
up and down
over and over
knitting the threads of my life
patching holes
until i see
the fabric of hope
i realize
that the very act of weaving
strengthens me
like my morning exercise
weaving strengthens me