Sometimes I need a kick start to be silly 🙃. sometimes I want to make someone else smile. I have a whole collection of photos for that. I can send a card snail mail or attach it to an email.
I can get caught up in my own life and all my posts reflect a worry, concern, joy, angst, pleasure, wonder, gratitude, frustration... you get the idea... I somehow make it all about me. Here I continually say that life is not all about me and yet my blog doesn't always reflect that. Sometimes I need a kick start to be silly 🙃. sometimes I want to make someone else smile. I have a whole collection of photos for that. I can send a card snail mail or attach it to an email. I pull one out when the occasion arises. After all the seriousness, I thought perhaps you'd like a smile as well. Now wasn't that fun?
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My brother Pete emailed me today with stories of what is going on in his life. At one point in the email he said "So I really hope you are sitting down right now! I am going to help out with the church down the street from me tomorrow. I met them all because they have an amazing food pantry that I use. They also have great breakfasts that I am invited to where I meet great people. I really feel good there and they are all fine that I don't have religion and don't believe in God. I really enjoy the sense of community and know I need it." Now the "I really hope you are sitting down" was probably written because I have worked in a church for the last 11 years. It made me ponder what that looks like to Pete and other friends who do not 'go to church'. One description of person who does not go to church is 'unchurched'. There are those who believe in 'something', but aren't sure what that is. There are those who have experienced a terrible happening and believe that if there were a God, that would not have happened. There are those who believe in a higher power. There are those who grew up in the church, but as adults 'walk away' and fill their time 'with more important things'. But let's concede that there is common ground shared by many, especially when you look at the level of basic values and statements of belief about morality. I contend there are many faces of God, many ways to express being devout. "God doesn't give us what we can handle, God helps us handle what comes our way." God doesn't make bad things happen. I firmly believe that life is NOT all about us. I believe that life is about others. We are born to use our gifts to the greater good. I believe every single person should be doing something EVERY week for someone else. I believe we honor our life when we honor others. The people running the soup kitchen aren't judging Pete. They are using their gifts of compassion, service, encouragement to care for someone other than themselves. They are probably like me when I work at our soup kitchen; working hard to not judge. Working to put aside my experiential background in witness to their problem solving strategies and life choices. Before each meal at the soup kitchen a prayer is said. I make the prayer faith filled, but not preachy. I know most of the people there, like Pete, do not go to church, but it does not mean they are hostile to faith. It probably just means they don't think church is for them. My role, and the role of all in the act of serving others is to be a positive truth to their day. I do believe God is my guide. I believe God loves us in spite of ourselves and I believe as you read scripture it can make a difference and be your guide. Almost everything in life is a judgment call and tho I still question, I have enough information to make a wise decision and believe. As Jeff says, no one can give you faith... that's something you have to struggle with on your own; that's what it means to be human. I'm pretty sure Pete will be welcome as long as he chooses to participate. The role of the church is not to force feed faith, but to show by example that faith, hope and love enrich one's life to the fullest.
Two things are happening simultaneously in my life. Well actually far more than two, but these two seem to be driving my days. Pastor Jeff is doing a sermon series called Spring Cleaning... with the analogy of cleaning our house comes the idea of cleaning up our own act, body, mind and soul. Secondly, I have just finished yet another book by Berne Brown; "The Gift of Imperfections". Lately I have felt failure thrumming through my days. I am tired and cranky, not a pretty combination. The very sad part of that is that I have a beautiful life. I don't have Parkinson's, Russ does! I watch the folks in my Parkinson's class as well as our Parkinson's education group; now there is a reason to be tired or cranky! Not only does my house need spring cleaning, but my attitude does as well. I need to take a break now and then to refresh. Yesterday I walked the hiking trail across the road from our development. It was a rare personal reflection time. I often do things alone, but they are mostly errands, being in the car going from here to there or household chores. But to truly 'be alone' is rare. This spot sits above the Valley. There is a wonderful gazebo with a patio chair up there. I sat and prayed for calm, patience, and a serving heart. I listened to bird song, the train whistle, the rustle of wood critters and the quiet. I have been irritable and Russ has been my rock. Shouldn't it be the other way around? I am cranky, yet there is nothing particular that I am angry about? This morning Russ said, "I want to be less of a burden on you. Help me to figure that out please." Now there was the kindest of kind, a guy who understands acts of service! From his place of the hundreds of 'good-byes', he is the one with the serving heart and I am wanting him to: be safe, do one thing at a time, articulate, swallow, stabilize, and a huge one for us, S-L-O-W down. How do I do life? Over and over and over... People aren't perfect, marriages aren't perfect and most certainly life isn't perfect. But remembering to take time for myself allows me to jump start the rally cry to start again. Where does that leave me? Leave us? It leaves us moving past the feelings that Parkinson's has imposed upon us. It leaves us acknowledging our mutual losses, but ready to fall in love again!
Who are the wise and wonderful people in your life? There was a piece on the radio today as I was driving into work where the commentator spoke of trying to "fill his Grandfather's shoes" and what a huge task that was! It engaged me; got me to ponder who that person might be in my life. Was there a colossal figure in my life who commanded my total respect and awe? I think of 'filling someone's shoes' to mean they did a wonderful job at something and I want to emulate their behavior. It means I want to work towards being the kind of person they are. I say that with a bit of caution though because shoes are personal! Generally we do not loan our shoes out because they would feel awkward; the shoes are molded to our own feet. I did appreciate the reminder that we all have room in this life to strive to be a better human being. I don't have to be someone I'm not. I am not mechanical, I would never own a frivolous 'toy' such as this and I do not like to draw the attention of the police (doesn't this look like a police magnet?). But the owner of this bike let me shed my public 'control' and challenge myself to some frivolous fun. I decided to step into his 'shoes'.
Many people in my life speak to my soul, drawing me closer to the person I am and to the person I want to become without mimicking the whole of someone. Who are these people? What kind of 'shoes' would I like to wear? Here are a few of many...
Trying to fill someone else's shoes can be depressing because the fit is all wrong. Being consumed by the effort of trying to be someone you aren't shadows your own creation and beauty. But I find aiming towards being a better person with the pieces of others I appreciate is allowing me to strive to be more me than I have ever been. "Make the most of yourself....for that is all there is of you." --Ralph Waldo Emerson I am a person of plenty. Money, as an entity, keeps cropping up in my conscious lately. It is not just for me, but in watching those around me. In my view, money is often not about finances, but about emotions. I would contend fear, shame and anger drive many of our money issues and decisions. Most of us tend to think it is about our bank balance and though that is important, money is also connected to emotions. As I have said in the past, technology in this century floods us all with 'how to live'. My history of money management is sketchy at best. I most certainly did not learn it from my parents; my parents spent beyond their means. Dad chose to build a bigger and better (i.e. modern) house and Mom would take out a loan to give us the Christmas she felt we needed and which we learned to expect. I cannot even begin to imagine making those emotional choices for my life. Perhaps there is a little battle going on between the adult brain and the child brain. My adult brains knows my needs, my child brain is filled with wants. My adult brain holds close health, shelter and security. My child brain wants fun, unnecessary and the simple pleasures that the world tells me I MUST have. But I am a person of plenty. It is all a money puzzle. 'They' say what you learned about money as a child brings clarity to your adult life. My grandmother told me my first money story. When I was a small child, my maternal mother, Gail, went to my grandmother fearing my father was having an affair as he was more and more not home in the evenings. Turns out he was working nights at a gas station earning money to surprise her with the ultimate gift...a new car. Lesson learned? No need to communicate about big money expenditures. I am a person of plenty. My folks married when I was in the 6th grade and we moved to an A-M-A-Z-I-N-G old home. It had a porte cohere, sunroom, music room, front AND back stairs, a secret room, a tunnel, a laundry shoot, butlers pantry, 3 attics... like I said, A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. My parents died long ago so I cannot ask either what drove them to 'need' to build a house that was only a half mile away. Though lovely, I have always wondered why? Did they not feel as though they had plenty? Did they feel the need to show the world a modern success story? Did they want the six of us to have the visual advantage of success? Were they embarrassed about living in an 'old' house and wanted 'new'? Was it community and business status they were seeking? I have absolutely no idea, but I have always pondered. I have lived the life of 'plenty' and yet money has always been an issue. Sadly, money does influence how people treat you. A well dressed person has a more successful time in life than a homeless person. People tend to have more respect for wealthy people, even when they might not deserve it. Our school system does not include financial education so we go forth into the world with little or no financial roadmap. Then what?
I contend that from there we must choose how money will drive our lives. If I had constantly thought of money as a negative thing, I would be plagued with the need and want for more. Thankfully I am a person of plenty! Somehow I came upon the success of living within my means. I have Russ to thank for that! He taught me that money is something we control and not the other way around. Materialism and consumerism drives people. So deep is the need to impress that we feel embarrassed to tell our friends and co-workers we can't 'do or have' something because we don't have the money. My lesson from childhood was that I must 'have' to be popular. I am embarrassed to admit that after Christmas I would get on the phone with my friend Susan and shamelessly flaunt the details of all my Christmas presents. (reminder: they may have all been bought with a bank loan to provide us with the perfect Christmas gifts) Life has a way of forcing a certain reality. I am not immune to the want winning over the need. I wanted nice porch furniture. I wanted a decorative surround for my grill. I want, want, want all the time. But we don't go into debt for those wants. I am ever grateful for Russ' clear thinking. I am a person of plenty. Pucker up; there is tang and some sweet in this recipe. I made it for the first time and it's a keeper! It is one of those recipes that will challenge you to pucker and smile at the same time. It is light and fresh and bursting with flavor. Of course ALL fresh lemon...as in juice, zest and decorative curls. That means you will need some sort of juicer and a zester. The crust calls for crystalized ginger. I have that on hand, but I am thinking you could do without it as it's not much. My gingersnaps are pretty darn snappy, so that too helped. Get ready to bake and then dig-in and enjoy! PUCKER UP CRUST
FILLING
PREPARATION FOR CRUST Position rack in center of oven and preheat to 350°F. Mix gingersnap cookie crumbs, sugar, and ginger in medium bowl. Add melted butter and stir until mixture is evenly moistened. Transfer crumb mixture to 9-inch-diameter glass pie dish; press crumbs firmly and evenly onto bottom and up sides to top of dish. Bake until crust is firm and slightly darker in color, about 8 minutes. Cool crust completely. FOR FILLING
STRAWBERRY SAUCE I did add a strawberry sauce drizzle to each piece of pie as I served it. It was a little bit of extra sweet to counter the lemon as well as pretty. Ingredients
Directions Combine the strawberries, sugar, lemon juice and 2 TBL. water in a saucepan. Cook over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until the berries break down, 10+ minutes. Remove from heat and stir in the vanilla. Strain through a fine-meshed sieve into a bowl, pressing against the solids. Cool completely. Store covered up to 4 days. |
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