We are just beginning a sermon series at church titled "Grateful Hearts". My role is behind the scenes, early support preparation. When a new series begins, I always wonder what direction it will take. With this one, I ponder my grateful heart. Really? Be grateful for Russ' Parkinson's? Be grateful that ADA mobility in Durango is not easy? Be grateful that our marriage partnership is changing and sometimes hard to keep up with? Be grateful for having to take on so many jobs that Russ used to manage? Really? This is something to be grateful for?
We all have worries. Life moves quickly and often it feels like I can barely keep up. In the land of Parkinson's and our changing lives, those fast paced changes can be with day-to-day stuff, but other times it is in the more dense worries and changes. Worry is inevitable and I simply can't control it's every whisper. However, I don't do myself any favors by pouring my soul into the minute details of every concern. I know that when things get tough (and believe me they do regularly) I need to work to find things to be thankful for. By starting small, I can actually make the feeling of gratitude bloom.
Gratitude is a strange and fragile thing. As a child I was referred to as 'Pollyanna', a favorite book character of mine who loved to play 'THE GLAD GAME". Pollyanna's 'Glad Game' was one of optimism. Her father taught her that whenever things got rough or sad, play the 'Glad Game' and find the silver lining. She had written to the missionary ladies for a doll, but what arrived was a pair of crutches; her father's game was born. I loved playing that game and I embraced it in my early years!
So where did that optimism go? The hardest part of fear and disappointment is trying to play the 'Glad Game', be gracious and filled with gratitude whatever experience I am handed, whether pleasant or not.I am well aware that the more life I breathe into things that make me happy, more of them will head my way. I know the more time I take to think about things I am thankful for, the less space obstacles will take up in my life. The challenge of living this new life of ours becomes vastly less intimidating when I play the 'Glad Game' and focus on tiny treasures.
What are the treasures? For an able bodied person one might wonder, really? But watching the physical decline of so many of our Parkinson's friends I am in awe of their persistence and so very grateful in my own life for:
- being able to roll over in bed
- the ease of getting in and out of the car
- holding utensils
- carrying dishes to the sink
- pulling blankets over myself
- cutting food with a fork and knife
- the simplicity of turning around to change direction
- showering
- speaking so others understand
- writing legibly
- filling my day will fulfilling tasks
- and a huge one, not being the person who day by day must say small good-byes to things that were once easy to accomplish
I am not sure how the PD folks play the 'Glad Game' but I urge you; whenever something or someone is pulling you down, put on your gratitude glasses, flip the switch, make the choice - be with grateful heart.