Yes, it takes COURAGE; both of us have to stand tall and be more committed to the reality of a degenerative disease than to our comfort zone. Neither of us walked into the PD life willingly, yet here we are! Instead of being a product of these uncomfortable circumstances, we need to focus on being a product of our decisions and live intentionally through our pre-planning. That means living intentionally. This of course can be a very difficult challenge given Russ' body is waging war on itself rather than being it's former efficient machine.
I am feeling as though I am finally moving towards acceptance. This does not mean caving in and giving up. This means I am willing to recognize, in this moment, it is what it is. It does not make PD go away, nor does it stop us from constantly adjusting or denying ourselves of hope. Acceptance removes a very unnecessary layer of suffering as I/we struggled against the truth.
It dawned on me about a month ago, that I was merely shrouding my days in a fog. I needed to take control, have some courage and live in the moment. I needed to take joy to make joy. I needed to courageously greet each day in a place of truth, making adjustments when needed. I'm trying. We're trying.