The photo is of an exercise class for those with PD. These folks are not longing to join the club, but most have entered through the curtain and now try to keep the light on... so to speak! Each is becoming a 'new person', sometimes unrecognizable to family and friends. This can be overwhelming for everyone. It begins as an inconvenience and gradually morphs into a collection of symptoms that 'become' the person.
The thing about the club is that the rules continually shift. At times I am skilled at managing my emotions when I look at the new man in my life. At other times stress over the changes leave me completely incompetent; lacking both calm and control.
'They' say, "take care of yourself first". When you fly on an airplane, the flight attendant will instruct you to put your own oxygen mask on in an emergency before helping others. This is a metaphor for my club, I run ragged taking care of Russ and his needs, forgetting about myself. Then a personality change surfaces, my new man challenges my stability and I am overwhelmed. I don't care for the new club rules.
When I am debilitated with newness I am not familiar with, negative emotions emerge. I need to step away, regroup and actually verbalize "Can you help me please?" They are simple words, but sometimes very hard to move past my lips. Ask and usually help is on the way...