Life here in Colorado continues on. My pat answer when people ask how we are doing is "good-ish". It is not great but we are managing. We try ever so hard to not have pity party on the same day, and sadly more often than not, it is my party! Russell is truly amazing managing the loss of his mobility. My 'party' comes when I am afraid for him, it is a party of fear. It is near impossible to 'learn' you can't just turn around. It is near impossible to 'learn' you can no longer sit down at a table and pull your chair in. It is near impossible to 'learn' a new way to shave after doing it the same way for 60+ years. But through it all, through the struggle, he keeps on keeping on. He is amazing.
I emailed friends tonight; friends from our past, friends not involved in our present life. If you wrote to someone you hadn't seen in moons, what would you write about? How do you give a snapshot of who you are at this moment without giving all the down and dirty details? Do you make it a litnay of drag and brag? Is it more of a grocery list? Life here in Colorado continues on. My pat answer when people ask how we are doing is "good-ish". It is not great but we are managing. We try ever so hard to not have pity party on the same day, and sadly more often than not, it is my party! Russell is truly amazing managing the loss of his mobility. My 'party' comes when I am afraid for him, it is a party of fear. It is near impossible to 'learn' you can't just turn around. It is near impossible to 'learn' you can no longer sit down at a table and pull your chair in. It is near impossible to 'learn' a new way to shave after doing it the same way for 60+ years. But through it all, through the struggle, he keeps on keeping on. He is amazing. So while we struggle to 'keep up' with the changes in life, I apparently look at many of the things he is loosing control over; the can'ts. Russ looks at what he can do. He can still turn around, but has to do it in increments and slowly. He sits at the dining table easily, but does so in a wheel chair... so much easier than trying to pull a chair forward while you're in it! He can shave, but it takes a lot longer and it is an adapted method, two handed. Through it all, through the struggle, he keeps on keeping on. He is amazing. His strength & determination astound me. I am a lucky woman.
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