What can that crack of hope bring into this period of hurt in grief? Maybe I need to truly embrace the concept of trust; believing that I will get through this, believing that I have gotten through some very difficult times in my life and I can do it again. Perhaps I need to team my 'wants' with faith and believe in the possibilities. As Martin Luther King Jr. said "Only in the darkness can you see the stars."
Holy Week seems like a good time for me to journey from dark to light. This challenge of grief can be overwhelming, it can attack my hope in a flash, sneaking up and taking hold of my heart. When I feel despair becoming dominant, I force myself to transition. In my mind I can cycle through the seasons and remind myself to notice the relationship they have with my internal seasons. The tiny crack of light, bringing hope and rebirth. My job now is to nurture it. I need to remind myself that I have done it before and I can do it again. I can and I will.